This weekend is Sanctity of Life Sunday. There are so many conversations to be had about the blessing of life which God grants to us: birth and abortion, disease and comfort, aging and death. The Lord is the Giver of Life. He is the One Who Breathes the Breath the Life, as we read in Genesis 2:7.
Below is a statement from my wife, written about contraception and our human frailty and sinfulness with respect to the life of children in marriage and our culture. I find it to express fully my position on the subject.
“My opinions and beliefs on this topic are not held for the purpose of judging anyone for their family size or decisions. Everyone has their untold story and I have no business ever making assumptions. I have been on the receiving end of that judgment, having been questioned for not having more children at 32 years of age. It was directed from someone who had no idea of our infertility struggles in the past 5 years or the miscarriage 2 years ago; no idea of the agony of mourning that loss and desperately trying to understand why my body would no longer do what it was designed to do and why God would withhold the blessing of more children. It was quite a journey of learning to listen to His will over my own and trust His timing in all things.
Any “judgment” I have is purely directed at the cultural mindset regarding life and children – the mindset of “one and done” or “I have my girl and my boy, so I’m done now.” The fact that we try to plan children around the lifestyle we want to maintain. Not wanting to have more than 2 because that would mean giving up the guest bedroom in order to not have to put 2 kids in a room. Or that more children means no more fancy vacations or having to put limits on career growth in order to raise a family; the idea that we shouldn’t have to sacrifice for our children. It’s the mindset that children are a choice in every sense of the word; the cultural view of children as a consequence or burden if they show up at the “wrong” time. Birth control allowed our society to go against natural law, as created by God himself, in order to accommodate our own desires – it compromised the value of children. It is the classic battle of our own sinful will vs. God’s will for us. It is this same mindset that allows our culture to let hundreds of thousands of kids in our own country and millions around the world to be without families – to be desperately waiting to be rescued by a loving family and wondering why they aren’t good enough for that. It’s the same mindset that has allowed us, in spite of the evidence God has shown us through science and technology, to question the validity of a child in utero and to be willing as a society to destroy millions of lives in their most vulnerable state. Children have become disposable in our culture. They have become a choice in every sense of the word and subjects of our own selfish agendas. They have become political pawns as we’ve seen unveiled already this year in this horrid issue between US and Russia. My judgment is on this entire mindset. I can’t sit there and say that abortion is wrong or try to advocate for adoption and not also recognize that children are already set up for these fates by the culture which decided they are optional to begin with, thus something to be prevented.
I’m not so naïve to think that getting rid of contraception would fix this problem. Our culture has gone too far over the edge in regards to this topic to just completely pull the rug out from beneath it all. I’m more concerned with the silence over the last 50 years or so from our churches on this subject. With exception to the Catholic church, which is the only one I’m aware of that has maintained a voice on the subject of birth control in regards to affirming life, the Christian church at large allowed itself to be overcome by the culture in this regard. Pastors are now held captive to fear of their members if they dare speak out about God’s truth regarding marriage, sexuality, and children. No one wants to be “judged” and they have convinced themselves that the church is the last place where they should be judged. That the church is love and love means tolerance and tolerance means no judgment. It is such a great lie that has taken over in our Christian churches and feels like an impossible battle for our pastors to fight. What good is the gospel if we are not convicted of our sins and recognize our need for a Savior? Thankfully, I am hearing more and more pastors braving the waters of these subjects, though most are treading slowly and carefully. It can’t stop there though. If we want children to be valued again, if we want life to be protected in all stages, if we want the church to rise up and give homes to those children without one, then we have to make life important again, starting at the point of the mere possibility of life, to the point of conception and then birth, and then see it through as children are abandoned for whatever reason by bringing them into our own homes. We can’t leave it to only our pastors to teach this. We have to have these conversations within our Christian friendships. We have to be strong enough to talk about this with anyone who will listen. And we most importantly have to teach this to our own children, because they will direct the future of these issues.”
“Worthy are you, our Lord and God,
to receive glory and honor and power,
for you created all things,
and by your will they existed and were created.” Revelation 4:11
Come, Lord Jesus! Amen!